Fear can be a primary emotion that our survival is often determined by. As a result of fear we try to escape from danger. But it is also what keeps us stuck and might rob us of wonderful possibilities and experiences.
For instance, you happen to be afraid to tell someone you need space as you don't want to hurt their feelings. So you are stuck in times of resentment or at least discomfort. Importantly, this situation isn't healthy for either party and needs action. But fear of confrontation has you paralysed and you also keep avoiding taking action. Normally, you wait for fear to attend then be capable of take action. But get that: Fear doesn't go away prior to taking action. It goes away As you may take action. So while you are afraid, in order to Overcoming fear you have to take action. You will have a concern with saying No? Say it anyway and the fear may go away. If you never refuse, your fear will continue to be with you forever.
Where does fear are derived from? Normally it comes from an assumption that you have made in regards to the results of a definite situation. Interestingly enough, that assumption is often times wrong. Take into account the concern with confrontation again. It may seem that being honest with all the body else will result in confrontation but you could be wrong. As an example, I am a dancer (besides as a BodyTalk practitioner). And So I employed to feel uncomfortable saying NO when folks that I didn't desire to dance with asked for any dance. The end result was countless horrible dances in my opinion and for the people I didn't wish to refuse to. Until one day I purchased the courage to "reject" someone, and that he actually thanked me. He said there seemed to be so much freedom within the NO, for both me and for him, and that he'd much rather take care of what's so than experience fake motions.
Granted, when I "rejected" someone, I didn't have the same "highly spiritual" reaction. To the contrary, I needed to handle someone's hurt, and my guilt to make them feel rejected. How arrogant of me to consider which i can make anyone feel anything! It will be nice once we had that power but that's only an illusion. People feel anything they feel not because we cause them to, but due to their beliefs and expectations. That's why the identical behaviour on my own part caused two different reactions in just two differing people. And neither reaction had anything whatsoever to do with me. I can't consider the credit for your first positive reaction to me rejecting an individual, and for that reason I can't be blamed for your second, negative one either.
Everyone is accountable for their own behaviour but no one would be to take credit or feel guilty for other people's feelings. The more you understand that you have little with regards to your mum's, your partner's or maybe your children's happiness (i.e. the less credit you practice because of it), the less fearful you will be devwpky40 you could cause unhappiness and upset. Acting with integrity is one and only thing you need to be worried about. Making people happy is just not your job, nor is it ever likely to be inside your power to do this.
Now, intellectualizing about how to deal with uncomfortable situations is all good, however the conversations about fear don't always help us overcome it. Remember: taking action equals overcoming fear. It is important to recognize that taking action is a muscle. The greater you exercise it, the less fear comes up being an problem for you. You go to say to yourself: "I've tried it before, I could do it again." Interestingly, for people who can't talk themselves into taking action, a different way to exercising this extremely important muscle is simply by performing physical exercises that push you from your comfort zone: tree climbing, sky jumping, abseiling, paragliding, etc. The physical and the mental always go together, therefore overcoming your anxiety about heights as an example will easily result in overcoming fear of switching your job, anxiety about setting boundaries, the fear of moving to a different country, concern with investing money, etc.
Recently i did the Adrenaline Forest Adventure in Tauranga and also the following day I could confront some big life changing decisions and carry on the discomfort with unbelievable confidence. I definitely didn't possess the strength and also the courage to deal with my challenging situation before I did this tree adventure. But while I was up in the trees trying to go through obstacles, confronted with fear over and over, I kept jumping ahead. And each time I took a leap in spite of my fear, the fear gave method to excitement after which confidence. When I finished the full adventure, I was thinking to myself "Basically If I could accomplish this, I could do anything." And therefore very muscle kicked from the following day once i had to undergo a choice making method that I needed previously been fearful of.
While hopping through the trees within the Adrenal Forest, I stumbled upon a woman that was sitting up there, completely paralyzed and waiting around for a person to rescue her. We were on course 4 and the majority of the tracks on course 4 are exactly like those on course 3, except higher. So she had already been through those obstacles once however she couldn't get it done again due to perception that extra height adds extra difficulty. I moved forward (not quite fearlessly, yet with determination) and yelled out that this track she was fearful of is at fact easier than a number of the ones she had already done. But she had already made an assumption that it was going to be hard and was too afraid to adopt action despite of the things i was saying. She said she was scared she might fall, completely forgetting the reality that she was wearing safety gear that wouldn't permit her to fall. And that's precisely what transpires with almost all of us confronted by fear. We forget that we are safe.
So, here are three items to take away today that can help you take action to be able to overcome fear. Number one, if you are going to help make assumptions regarding how people might react, assume the very best (you get everything you expect). Number two, assess the worst case scenario and realize that you are currently actually not in REAL danger, you might be safe. Not only that, remember that you can exercise the muscle of taking action by performing physically challenging activities and adventures. It really works also it can be fun too!